I am talking to my former supervisor (except here he’s not my former supervisor but he is inexplicably my current supervisor) about my very recent encounter with one of our worst problem patrons (Mr. K of the K family, for those in the know).  I’m explaining how terrible this encounter was, and how this man was not only irritating and insulting in his conversation with me, but how he went the extra mile and insulted me with a note, as well.  I show my former supervisor the note that Mr. K had pushed across the desk to me.

The note reads, “You are boring.”

My  supervisor seems to blow off my concerns, which makes a certain amount of sense given our relationship in real life.  [And to clarify things a little, no, this is not the former supervisor who reads this blog (so you can calm down, Mr. X!) ]  But anyway, Mr. K’s original behavior ticked me off, and then my supervisor’s behavior made my blood pressure rise even more.  So my discomfort is escalating, okay?  But apparently it wasn’t escalating quickly enough.  Because a minute later my supervisor and I are walking down the stairs somewhere in some building (I’m guessing it’s the library, but I’m not sure), and we pass my ex-ex-boyfriend walking up the stairs.  This would be the ex-ex-boyfriend with the anger management issues, for anyone keeping track at home.  I look at him, mentally process this, and I say to my supervisor, “That guy we just passed was an ex-boyfriend of mine.  He has some anger management issues.”

At this point I am approaching a very rare epiphany for me: I’m starting to realize that I’m dreaming WHILE I’m dreaming.  My thought process went something like this …

  • Wait, what are the possible odds of me running into someone I haven’t seen in twenty years?
  • Why did I have the thought “he has anger management issues” and then immediately SAY “he has anger management issues”?  That’s not something that I would ever do … okay, except for the first time I tried pot and didn’t think it was having any effect on me until I realized I was starting to speak my inside thoughts out loud without actually making a conscious decision to do it.  Which was when I decided that getting stoned in public wasn’t a good idea.
  • This is kind of ridiculous.  I mean, Mr. K. upsets me, my supervisor upsets me, and my former boyfriend upsets me.  The odds of me having to deal with all of them within one hour are just completely ridiculous.  It’s almost like someone or something is TRYING to upset me!

And that’s when I woke up.

I was lying on my left-hand side (I always sleep on my back or on my right side), my earbud headphone connected to my iPod was jammed painfully into my left ear, and my left leg was tangled in a heavy blanket and was tingling from the loss of circulation.

I’ve had several dreams in my life that could be partially or completely explained by physical issues.  Like I dream that I’m having a fistfight and I wake up tangled in the sheets and unable to move my arms.  Or I dream that I am looking for a bathroom and when I wake up I have to pee.  Like that.

Of course, Freud said that dreams are usually influenced by the events of the past day.  Using this theory, I thought back and remembered that the day before I’d had a conversation with Betsy about several of our most problematic patrons AND I’d had to help Mr. K at the information desk.  My blood pressure usually spikes whenever I see him because he is a total pain in the ass about 95% of the time, even though ironically this time around he was comparatively calm and actually paid some library fines for once instead of trying to bully us into waiving them.

The “you are boring” note is simply hilarious.  I mean, why would I get upset about a note like THAT?  I would just keep it for my scrapbook, or put it up over my desk so I could look at it and laugh.

My only explanation for having my ex appear in my dream is that my brain was so intent on making me wake up and move to a less painful position that it brought out the really big guns, so to speak.  I guess I should consider myself lucky that I woke up before the evil circus clowns showed up.  *SHUDDER*