Tripping, Stumbling, and Dancing Down Memory Lane

I just spent the last fifteen minutes singing and dancing along to ABBA’s iconic song “Fernando” while I was taking a shower.  Sadly, I couldn’t get credit for the dancing because I can’t wear my pedometer in the shower.

Perhaps I need to explain this small slice of my life.  Which part would you like me to explain first?

Oh, who am I kidding?  I know you want to hear about the ABBA song first.

Okay, so earlier today, I was having a conversation with D. about how one of the girls in my advisory group had complained to me back in the fall about how she’d just started going to an all-girls high school and how she was so depressed about it.  And I’d told her that *I* had attended an all-girls high school, and that there were several advantages to this kind of schooling.  As in, she would probably do better in school without as many distractions, and that she would probably form some of the best friendships of her life from that school.  But I also added that I DID date boys when I was in high school, both the boys I met when I worked at summer jobs and the boys I met in the martial arts class I took on Saturdays (and I added that a martial arts class was a great place to meet boys, because the dating odds were basically in your favor).

As I was telling D. this story, I added that my first kiss had been with a boy I met in my martial arts class, and that I’d gone to the prom with a boy I met in my martial arts class.  But the REST of the story (which I didn’t tell the girl from my advisory group and I didn’t mention to D.), was that my first kiss was from a boy named Fernando.  And that after it had happened I’d made the mistake of mentioning my affection for this boy to a girl in my class in school … who then proceeded to TELL THE REST OF THE CLASS ABOUT IT.  So, did I mention that this all took place in the early 1980′s?  When “Fernando” by ABBA was still a popular song?  Well, for the next several weeks, I found myself ambushed by various classmates who thought it would be HILARIOUS to start singing the chorus of “Fernando” to me in the classroom, in the schoolyard, on the street, or wherever would cause me the maximum amount of embarassment.  And to add insult to injury, I LOVED that frigging song!

So anyway, it was this conversation that put that song subconsciously back into my head for the first time in a long time.  Then several other things happened today that made the neurons in my brain fire faster (or differently) than usual:

I walked home from work instead of taking the bus (this ties into the pedometer thing).

We had an excellent steak dinner with some really good wine.

During the cooking of said dinner the smoke alarm went off, which almost gave me a frigging heart attack.

Before and during dinner we watched the last two episodes of Revolution, which had me jumping out of my seat.

So, on to the pedometer thing.  I’m part of a challenge at work right now involving keeping track of the number of steps we take each day, making many of us painfully aware of our all-too-sedentary lifestyles.  For the last several days I’ve been keeping track of how many steps I take both with a regular pedometer that clips on to my clothing (but which only seems to work well when clipped directly to my waistband) and with the CoreMobile app.  Which means that I have to keep reminding myself to carry my iPod Touch around with me everywhere in the apartment, even as I’m walking around getting ready for work or getting ready for bed.  But ironically, my most athletic activity of the day couldn’t be monitored by my pedometer.  And so it goes.

And now, because I know you’d like to have a dance party of your own, I present “Fernando” by ABBA!

Yes, it starts off slowly, but wait for the chorus.  You’ll see the dancing potential there.

[p.s. - While there are several responses that I COULD get to this post, there's one in particular that I'm definitely expecting.  Wait for it ... wait for it ...]

 

FYE, Some More NYC Pictures

Here is a collection of pictures that I’ve taken over the last month, in four out of the five boroughs of New York City (my apologies to Staten Island!)  Most of them are pictures that I took while walking through the Bronx and Manhattan, but there are also pictures from our recent Beer and Brewery Tour, plus a picture that I took outside The Bell House in Brooklyn last night while we were on line waiting to see a live recording of The Thrilling Adventure Hour!

 

Creepy Patrons at the Public Library: An Overview

A man came up to me at the service desk today, gestured to a book that we had on display nearby, and said, “Mary Higgins Clark … I’ll Walk Alone.  Isn’t that a song?  Do I need to start singing, now?”  I didn’t answer his question, but smiled and continued checking out his items as though he hadn’t said anything.

Now, you might be wondering why I’m including this harmless exchange in a post with this title.  Well, that’s because the man in question is someone who I’ve dubbed the Creepy Old Flirt because he has a tendency to say inappropriate or sexual things to us when he approaches us (i.e. – female staff members) at the desk.  The Creepy Old Flirt was actually going to be the topic of his own blog post until about a week ago, when another patron started running neck-and-neck in the “OMG you are creeping me out so much that I need to go home and take a long hot shower to make me feel clean again” department.  And then some advice trickled down to us from a security higher-up who told our branch manager that she should speak to the female staff members about being careful not to dress too provocatively at work … which then led to a conversation about a whole slew of examples from our own experiences about how library patrons could be creepy no matter HOW we dressed … which led to the “overview” theme of this post.  Because past is present is prologue, unfortunately, when it comes to creepy patrons at the library.

So I guess I should explain what I mean by “creepy” when it comes to our patrons or … you know … to anybody.  Let me start by saying that by my definition creepiness, like sexual harassment, is in the eye of the beholder.  Person A can say the exact same thing with the exact same inflection to persons B, C, and D.  Person B thinks that it’s flattering and wonderful, and starts smiling and laughing.  Person C thinks that it’s kind of weird that person A said that, but chooses to diplomatically ignore it or change the subject.  While person D interprets it as sexual harassment and/or whips out a can of pepper spray.  If it’s a stranger and/or a library patron, I usually fall into the “diplomatically ignore” category myself … unless the same person does it several times OR the person says something that immediately sends my creep-o-meter off the charts.  To give a few examples:

• The middle-aged woman who asked what color lipstick I was wearing, and then after I answered her spent several uncomfortably long moments staring silently at my lips.  [mildly creepy]
• The old lady who took a break from her usual topics of conversation with me — biographies of long-dead celebrities — to let me know about a medical issue she was having by adding, “I have to go to the doctor now to talk to him about some vaginal bleeding I’ve been having.  Can you imagine?  At MY age!”  [That conversation went from zero to sixty on the creepiness scale, and then back down to zero because we've never had a conversation like that again.  Thank God.]
• The guy who, when I was teaching a computer class, asked if he could record me because it would help him remember the lesson … who then several weeks later walked up to me on the floor while I was walking from the information desk and said, “You know, you really have a lovely voice.  I listen to it every night while I go to sleep.”  [AIGH!!!!!!!!!]

Oh, and just to be clear, even when somebody does something that makes my creep-o-meter go off the charts, I always try to keep a poker face and act diplomatic in front of that person.  After all, I don’t know if the person in question is TRYING to freak me out (and so I shouldn’t give the person the satisfaction of seeing me react), and also … well, the larger issue is that these people know where I work.  And I work in a public library, so they can come to my workplace and stare at me or follow me any time they want.  So I don’t want to antagonize anyone, even if they DO freak me out.

Now, that’s not to say that I do nothing.  If there’s a patron who is making me feel uncomfortable, is harassing me, or (God forbid) following me, I make sure to tell my colleagues and my supervisor.  We all have patrons whom we try to avoid for different reasons, and working with my colleagues means that we can run defense for each other, or help each other escape a patron’s entanglements.  Several of us have had instances where we’ve gone to another part of the building and dialed someone’s extension to give that person an excuse to escape a patron’s unwanted attention.  Having my colleagues around to watch my back is one of the few things that’s helped to keep me sane at this job.  And that’s why when something creepier than usual happens with a patron, I’m sure to point this person out to my colleagues so that we can all keep an eye out for unusual behavior.

So let’s get back to the Creepy Old Flirt and why I gave him that name in the first place.  Back in the old days when the circulation and information desks were separate (also known as the Good Old Days), we librarians didn’t have much contact with this man.  He WAS on our radar, but only because one of the other patrons accused him of underlining library materials in pen.  We suspected that this was true, but never managed to catch him in the act.  Anyway, apparently he would be overly friendly with the female clerks, but we didn’t have any flirtatious interactions at the information desk.  Well, now that we’ve evolved into the “joint service desk” model, all of the conversations that used to take place at the separate desks now take place at the same desk.  So we’re all under the same flirtation umbrella now.  Here are some highlights from the Creepy Old Flirt’s conversations with the female staff at the service desk (oh, and to help you visualize this better, I will tell you that he is loud, unattractive, and somewhere between my father’s age and my grandfather’s age)(and my grandfather died over a decade ago):

• So, when are we gonna go on vacation together, huh?  Wanna go on a cruise to Aruba?
• Oh, my favorite girlfriend!  /  Oh, my favorite beautiful lady!
• [After looking around our new building]  Nice building!  So, where do you have your orgies?
• [Upon seeing two female staff members at the desk]  Ah, two beautiful ladies.  Which one do I pick?  Because if I pick the wrong one, you’re gonna hit me in the head with your pocketbook, right?
• [Pushes a newspaper with a picture of a "gun bra" across the desk to a female staff member]  I’m from Homeland Security!  I need to check you out!  *laughs*  [She gently pushes the newspaper back and tries to act like he didn't say anything.  He pushes the newspaper towards her and says it again.  She pushes the newspaper back and tries to continue with the normal transaction.  He pushes it back towards her and says it AGAIN.]

So … pretty creepy, right?  But now let me tell you about the guy who’s been giving him a lot of competition in the creepiness contest lately.  I’m going to call this guy the Creepy Foreign Flirt.  Oh, and he’s also unattractive and also older than my father, for those of you keeping score at home.  [Side note:  Just how insulted should I be that most of the men who say flirtatious things to me at the library fall into this category?  I mean, really insulted or really REALLY insulted?]

Okay, so the Creepy Foreign Flirt is not as creepy as often as the Creepy Old Flirt.  The COF says something inappropriate between 50%-75% of the time.  The CFF will be fine for days or weeks at a time, and then suddenly … WHAM!  You’re blindsided by a creepy comment.  What makes it worse it that he tends to get you away from the desk before unleashing the comments that will make your skin crawl.  Usually he’ll approach the service desk and say that he’s having trouble with the computer / printer / etc.  Then when I come out from behind the desk and start walking over towards his computer, the conversation takes an unpleasant turn (well, unpleasant for ME, anyway).  It will usually go something like this:

• I’m having trouble with my computer.  Can you help me?  [thirty seconds later]  Once again, the computers have brought us closer together.
• I’m having trouble with my computer.  Can you restart it?  [one minute later]  So … have you seen any good movies lately?  Do you go to the movies often?  What kind of movies do you like to see?
• So … that’s a nice shirt you’re wearing!  [I say thank you, and ask how I can help him]  Uh … I’m trying to print out something, but it’s not coming out and there’s a light flashing on the printer.  [I come out from behind the desk, and start walking towards the printer]  Plus, now I can get a better look at that shirt!

I mean, first off … EWWWWWWWW!   AUGH!  GROSS!  GROSS!  GROSS!!!  I mean, Jeez, I’m just insulted, and irritated, and totally creeped out by this.  Now, it’s not like I have a boatload of options here.  I can tell him that he’s offensive and creepy and gross, and I can even have the whole “Not if you were the last man on earth” conversation.

And then what?  Then he knows that he got to me and upset me, and maybe that’s what he wanted all along.  I could say, “You know what?  My colleague is going to help you with that instead.”  But I wouldn’t throw any of my female colleagues under the bus like that, and I would only use a male colleague as a human shield if a male colleague was available (which is not always the case) AND if I was sure that the question wouldn’t end up rebounding back to me anyway.  So in lieu of a better option, I usually just act like I didn’t hear the comment and continue on as if the person didn’t say anything inappropriate.

Oh, and FWIW, in case you were wondering, on the day of that last comment I was NOT wearing a sexy outfit.  I was NOT wearing a man-trapping outfit.  Yes, I have a few of those, and they’ve had varying levels of success over the years.  But in fact I was just wearing some comfortable clothes, appropriate for a casual Saturday at work.  I will also tell you that two minutes after that conversation, I went to my office and got a cardigan to wear over that shirt, and then proceeded to wear that cardigan for the rest of the day even though it was warm inside.  Did he notice?  Did he understand the implications of that action?  Did any of the working synapses in his brain fire up and send a signal to his logic circuits?  I have no frigging idea.

So for now, I keep up a professional forcefield around me to the best of my ability.  But when I do finally leave public library service, problem patrons in general (or “migraines in human form,” as Mr. X calls them) and creepy patrons in particular are going to be at the top of my list of reasons why I’ll be glad to leave this job behind me.

 

Video Game Recommendations for Brain Exercise, for Relaxation, and for Satisfying the Need to Kill Things at the End of a Long Day

I’m trying to remember the first game that I ever got for my iPod Touch.  It might have been Angry Birds, or it might have been Plants vs. Zombies, both of which I still enjoy to this day.  Those games, as well as the Angry Birds spinoffs I’ve purchased (Angry Birds Seasons and Angry Birds Star Wars), were very sound investments for me.  But I’m guessing that you’ve already heard about those games, so I’m going to tell you about a few more.  I’ll start with games that I’ve played on my iPod Touch and my iPad (but which may also be available on other platforms, as well), and finish up with some online games that I have bookmarked on my computer at home.

 

A Backlog of Posts is On its Way

Over the course of the last week I’ve been doing a lot more walking since the weather has been comparatively lovely, and I’ve been taking a lot of pictures while I walk … pictures to be shared soon.

I participated in a Career Day at one of my local high schools, and there were several notable improvements over previous years … details to be shared soon.

I went on a super-cool Beer and Breweries tour with my boyfriend … details to be shared soon.

I saw some more good movies and some more bad movies, plus I’ve been reading some awesome books lately … details to be shared soon.

I was recently asked for some iPod / iPad game recommendations by a friend who recently crossed over to the Apple-infused Dark Side, which reminded me that I was planning to write a blog post on that very topic since I’ve been playing some awesome games lately.  So … details to be shared soon?  Maybe?

Well, as long as you understand that in this case “soon” means “not today,” Dear Readers.  I’m pretty wiped out right now, and I’m going to go to bed early.  I mean, after listening to some podcasts while fighting monsters in a virtual dungeon for a little while.  It helps me unwind at the end of a long day.

So … do any of those topics look interesting to you?  Let me know and I’ll bump those to the “sooner rather than later” list!

 

Kitty x 2

Our cat likes lying down on different surfaces in different places throughout the day, which is why we have throw rugs, blankets, and towels in different parts of the apartment for him.  But sometimes at the end of the day, his favorite place to be is lying on my desk right in front of my computer screen.  I took this picture of him last night in front of the monitor, which displays a picture of him in his kitten days.

 

25 Vintage Photos of Librarians Being Awesome

My boyfriend just sent me this link.  It’s just what I needed to pick up my spirits after a long day at the library!

http://flavorwire.com/387224/25-vintage-photos-of-librarians-being-awesome/view-all